Last night was enrichment night. They had an "8 Cow Wife" theme that was pretty fun. At the end of the evening they announced that they had a special surprise for each of us. They told us that all of our husbands had written us letters and they were going to pass them out to us.
When they first mentioned the letters my heart clenched up and for a moment I had this terrible feeling- like how you might feel if you knew someone was going to burn you and you just had to wait for it to happen. Let me explain why....
Years ago when I was on my mission all of the missionaries were brought together for a Christmas party. It was a great evening with a lot of fun but also with some really great words from our mission president. We were in a chapel and the spirit in the room was overwhelmingly strong. I felt great. Then President Hyde announced to us that they had contacted all of our parents and that each of us had a letter from them. They proceeded to pass out the letters. I was so ecstatic you wouldn't believe it. Most of you know that my father isn't really a part of my life so I wasn't expecting anything from him- but to know that I had gotten a letter from my mother just made me so happy. The reason? Because at that point in my mission I had never received a letter from her. I love my mother- I think she tries to do her best. But she wasn't all that supportive of me going on a mission- she never understood what it all meant to me. I had accepted the fact that my mother wasn't going to write me on my mission and I took those feelings and shoved them deep and far away so that I didn't have to think about it. But there, in that chapel, with letters being passed out, and a promise from President Hyde that we ALL had letters I felt so hopeful and happy. I waited, and waited as everyone around me got their very own letter from their parents. The room was quiet as people read them except for some who were crying. I waited and my letter never came.
I was so disappointed and even thinking about it now still makes me cry. I went home feeling terrible. My very good day turned into something horrible. Of course I got over it and found renewed reasons of why I should be happy on my mission.
So anyways- back to last night. When they announced that we all had letters from our husbands my initial feelings were of a sickening fear. But then I thought- No, this is my Bret we're talking about here. I KNOW he won't let me down. And I was right.
I got a letter from my wonderful husband telling me wonderful things. It made me so happy and I couldn't stop bawling. I am married to a good man. Before I met him I taught myself not to depend on people because it seemed like they always let me down. Even the people who were supposed to be the pillars of strength- they just weren't there when I needed them to be. But Bret is my rock. I can always count on him. He is dependable, reliable, constant, sturdy. When he says he's going to do something- he does it. He is the best friend you could ever have because he will always help you when you need it. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful husband. I am so very thankful that I have him in my life and that I can depend on him and know that he will never let me down. I love him. I thank Heavenly Father for making him.